When I was in junior high I couldn’t have been more removed from the cool kids if I’d tried.
I didn’t have name brand ANYTHING.
I tried to convince my mom that wearing polo shirts with the little guy on the horse was REALLY important, but she was unconvinced by the 10X price tag.
I definitely didn’t have cool hair or any other of the attributes that the cool girls had.
They had something about them that made other people believe that they were popular.
It was only later that I realized that it was because they appeared to be confident.
Ultimately, it didn’t even matter whether they actually WERE confident inside — because they acted that way or there was something about the way that they carried themselves, other kids wanted to be just like them.
Later, I found out from a number of them that they ended up struggling with things like eating disorders, depression and addiction.
These things often hadn’t completely manifested yet when we were all in junior high, but the foundation of those things were there, and much of the confidence people saw in these girls was actually just a way of covering up the same kind of insecurities that the rest of the kids felt, too.
I would never have guessed that from my perspective, though. I thought they had it all!
Yet how things seemed on the outside didn’t match their inner experience.
In this week’s episode (#126), Tia and I discuss the difference between Confidence and Bravado, what it means to be truly confident, and what changes when you have true confidence.
The GFC (Group Frequency Calibration®) at the end will help begin to release the distortion patterns that keep people from experiencing true confidence.
Without letting go of these distortion patterns, the opportunities or success we yearn for can feel difficult to attain, and sometimes can even cause us to feel like we don’t deserve them.
Let’s rise together!
Karen
SUMMARY:
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In Karen’s experience, it’s surprisingly common for people to feel anxious, uncertain, be in self-doubt — and feel certain that the people around them are self-assured and full of confidence. But an outward appearance of confidence doesn’t necessarily indicate an internal state that matches it.
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Confidence is often assessed or gauged based on outward behaviors that we believe indicate its presence: boldness, brashness, an air of authority, and even arrogance. But very often, such behaviors do not signify confidence.
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True confidence is typically rather quiet. It’s when you are aware of and actually experience your connection to Pure Source, your brilliance, and your completeness on spirit level. There’s nothing to prove. It’s a softly emanating sureness that you don’t need anyone’s approval — you are enough. You simply are.
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It’s often the case that when confident people do choose to speak, others want to listen. They want to take in what you’re saying because it comes from a place of wholeness or completeness. Sharing presence with a confident person can elevate others in resonance.
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Bravado is often an indication that people are riddled with self-doubt and low self-worth. There’s a need to push one’s frequencies into others to be dominant, find acceptance, or to feel better about themselves. It comes from the ego mind.
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The key to increasing confidence is to release distortion patterns — the GFC at the end of this episode is a great start. And when you release those patterns, confidence eventually follows — simply as a natural consequence of having released the distortions. When you’re able to do that, it gives others the permission to do the same: to be as they are in the moment with you. It can be a tremendous catalyst for someone.